Because life is all about balance—like quinoa pretending to be fun, while cheesecake slides in with zero nutritional regrets.
This quinoa bowl is your daily fiber, protein, and illusion of self-discipline, dressed up with veggies and smug health vibes.
Then, boom—coffee caramel cheesecake enters like a delicious scandal at a wellness retreat.
It’s earthy, creamy, and completely sabotages your kale credibility in one decadent bite.
So yes, you’re eating clean—right after that rich, caffeine-laced dessert that whispers, “Namaste, but make it naughty.”
Quinoa Bowl with Coffee Caramel Cheesecake
A wholesome quinoa bowl meets its sultry dessert soulmate—coffee caramel cheesecake. A meal that pretends to care but totally doesn’t.
Ingredients
For the Quinoa Bowl:
- 1 cup quinoa rinsed
- 2 cups water
- 1 tbsp olive oil
- ½ red bell pepper diced
- ½ zucchini chopped
- ¼ cup red cabbage shredded
- ½ avocado sliced
- 1 tbsp lemon juice
- Salt and pepper to taste
For the Coffee Caramel Cheesecake:
- 1½ cups crushed graham crackers
- ⅓ cup melted butter
- 2 packs 8 oz each cream cheese, softened
- ½ cup granulated sugar
- 1 tbsp all-purpose flour
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 2 eggs
- ¼ cup brewed coffee strong and broody
- ¼ cup sour cream
- ½ cup caramel sauce homemade or store-bought, depending on your self-worth
Instructions
Quinoa Bowl:
- In a pot, combine quinoa and water. Bring to a boil, reduce heat, and simmer until fluffy (about 15 minutes).
- Heat olive oil in a pan. Sauté bell pepper, zucchini, and red cabbage until slightly tender but still judging you.
- Fluff cooked quinoa with a fork. Add veggies, avocado slices, lemon juice, salt, and pepper. Mix like you’re solving world peace.
Coffee Caramel Cheesecake:
- Preheat oven to 325°F. Mix graham crumbs with melted butter. Press firmly into a pan to form the base of poor decisions.
- Beat cream cheese until smooth. Add sugar, flour, vanilla, eggs, and coffee. Blend until dangerously creamy.
- Fold in sour cream, because texture matters, apparently.
- Pour over crust. Bake for 35 minutes or until the top barely jiggles like your willpower.
- Cool completely, then drown it in caramel sauce like an emotional coping mechanism.
Notes
Nutritional Values (Per Serving)
Calories: 540Total Fat: 28g
Saturated Fat: 12g
Carbohydrates: 52g
Fiber: 5g
Protein: 14g
Vitamins & Minerals (Per Serving)
- Calcium: 10%
- Vitamin A: 15%
- Iron: 12%
- Vitamin C: 18%
- Magnesium: 11%
Notes & Flavor Tips
- Toast the quinoa before cooking if you’re feeling extra crunchy.
- Add hummus to the bowl for creamy self-deception.
- Use espresso in cheesecake for bolder regret.
- Chill cheesecake overnight—because some desserts, like drama, improve with time.
- Sprinkle sea salt on caramel to fake gourmet-level decisions.
