Step 1: Whip aquafaba and cream of tartar with an electric mixer until stiff peaks form and you're emotionally invested.
Step 2: Add granulated sugar gradually while mixing. Beat until glossy. Fold in vanilla.
Step 3: Sift almond flour, powdered sugar, and espresso powder together. Fold into aquafaba mixture gently.
Step 4: Pipe small rounds onto a lined baking tray. Let sit for 45–60 minutes until they form a dry shell.
Step 5: Bake at 300°F for 18–20 minutes. Cool completely while whispering affirmations.
Step 6: Make buttercream by beating butter, sugar, espresso powder, and milk until fluffy. Pipe onto half the shells and sandwich them.
Step 7: Arrange your cheeses, fruits, nuts, crackers, olives, and those glossy macarons on a platter. Garnish like you're building a crown.
Step 8: Snap a pic, serve it up, and pretend you didn’t stress over every single macaron crack.