Step 1: Preheat your oven to 350°F and grease the baking dish with the kind of love you save for Friday night skincare.
Step 2: In a bowl, mix flour, cocoa, espresso, sugar, baking powder, baking soda, and salt. Stir like you mean it.
Step 3: Combine almond milk and vinegar. Let it sit five minutes and turn into your makeshift vegan buttermilk.
Step 4: Add oil and vanilla to the milk mix. Stir the wet into the dry. Mix until smooth, not psycho.
Step 5: Pour batter into your dish. Bake for 25 minutes. Cool completely before you touch it—patience, queen.
Step 6: Mix strawberries, maple syrup, and lemon juice. Let them marinate while you resist eating the whole cake.
Step 7: Whip the coconut cream with sugar and vanilla until it fluffs up like your favorite 90s hair mousse.
Step 8: Cut the cake into cubes. Layer cake, strawberries, and cream in the trifle dish like you’re building edible art.
Step 9: Repeat until full. Chill for 30 minutes, or dive in immediately if self-control is not your brand.