Let’s be honest—some days, the only thing cooking is our patience and maybe our last nerve. Enter this glorious vegan Slow Cooker “Chicken” Curry, where tofu and bold flavors fake poultry better than your ex faked emotional maturity. And just when you think you’ve peaked, BAM! Coffee Panna Cotta crashes the party like a caffeinated supermodel in silky plant-based heels. This recipe is for every woman who’s tired of overcomplicated dinners, flavorless fake meats, and coffee that never quite makes it to dessert. Let the slow cooker work its magic while you pretend you’ve got your life together.
Slow Cooker Chicken Curry with Coffee Panna Cotta
This dish pairs a rich, fragrant vegan slow cooker curry with a creamy, indulgent coffee panna cotta—basically, dinner and dessert that whisper, “you’re fabulous.”
Ingredients
For the Vegan Chicken Curry:
- 1 block extra-firm tofu pressed and cubed (14 oz)
- 1 cup coconut milk full-fat, because we’re worth it
- 1/2 cup vegetable broth
- 1 onion chopped
- 3 garlic cloves minced
- 1 tbsp ginger grated
- 2 tbsp curry powder
- 1 tsp turmeric
- 1/2 tsp cumin
- 1/2 tsp paprika
- Salt and pepper to taste
- 1 tbsp tomato paste
- 1 cup canned chickpeas drained
- 1 cup diced tomatoes
- 1 tbsp olive oil
- Fresh cilantro for garnish optional, unless you’re being fancy
For the Coffee Panna Cotta:
- 1 1/2 cups almond milk
- 1/2 cup strong brewed coffee
- 2 tbsp maple syrup
- 1 tsp vanilla extract
- 2 tsp agar-agar powder
- A few coffee beans for sass optional garnish
Instructions
For the Curry:
- In a skillet, heat olive oil. Add onion, garlic, and ginger. Sauté until you smell something magical (5 minutes).
- Toss in curry powder, turmeric, cumin, paprika, and tomato paste. Stir until it looks like curry paste’s spicy cousin.
- Transfer the mess into your slow cooker. Add tofu, chickpeas, tomatoes, coconut milk, and broth. Stir and sass it up.
- Cook on low for 6 hours. Do literally anything else.
- Stir, season with salt and pepper, and toss fresh cilantro like you’re on a cooking show.
For the Coffee Panna Cotta:
- In a saucepan, combine almond milk, coffee, maple syrup, and vanilla. Stir like you mean it.
- Sprinkle in agar-agar. Bring to a boil while whisking like it owes you money.
- Let simmer for 2 minutes, then pour into molds.
- Chill in fridge for at least 2 hours (also a great time to chill yourself).
- Unmold, garnish with coffee beans if you’re extra.
Notes
Nutritional Values (Per Serving)
- Calories: 310
- Total Fat: 13g
- Saturated Fat: 6g
- Carbohydrates: 35g
- Fiber: 7g
- Protein: 13g
Vitamins and Minerals (% per serving)
- Iron: 20%
- Calcium: 25%
- Vitamin B6: 15%
- Magnesium: 18%
- Potassium: 12%
Additional Tips for Flavor Bragging Rights
- Freeze tofu before cooking for that “chicken-y” texture—so convincing, your carnivore aunt won’t notice.
- Add a pinch of cinnamon to the curry if you’re feeling bougie.
- Use espresso for panna cotta if you’re emotionally attached to caffeine.
- Swap almond milk with oat milk for creamier results and stronger oat-fueled self-worth.
- Top the panna cotta with shaved dark chocolate to impress even yourself.
